Can a need and a want be the same?
by fmpwolf180
Summary: Royai-rated m for lemony I think that is what it is called  content later. Takes place after the FMA movie. Includes an actual plot with new Homonculi.
1. Reunion

Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist. But I do own most of the ideas represented in this story.

BEWARE!- MAJOR SPOILERS. If you have not finished the anime of Full Metal Alchemist AND the movie, turn back now! SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS!

As soon as he was back, he was gone. He left this side of the gate with his brother, and the general managed to close the gate on this side. Though the Full Metal Alchemist was gone, he would continue to live with us spiritually. None of us would forget him.

The thing that really upset her the most though, was the re-disappearance of her beloved general. He stayed only long enough to close the gate, then was gone. All the time she spent waiting for him went to waste- she had foolishly expected more than this. She was certain she could confess to him if he returned, but when he gave her only a few seconds to do so, she couldn't bring herself to.

Now she was curled up in her home, the bed sheet over her head, and a cough would escape her lungs every now and then. This thought ate away at her. How much she wanted him to return suffocated her every breath, her every thought and action.

With a knock on the door, she sprang to her feet, rolling towards the sound, carrying a small fire-arm. The door opened on its own and her intruder's chin was met with the nozzle of the gun.

"Hawk-eye, I see you're well."

The gun fell to the floor with a clatter and she saluted promptly. A small, "Sir," came off her lips.

The Flame Alchemist stood in front of her, in his usual blue military attire. She was certain his sharp ears would hear her rampant heart beating out of her chest. So many emotions clustered on her lips, waiting to be appeased,

"May I-"

Hawk-eye stood aside and let the general pass her. His boots made loud noises as he walked. Stooping down, she retrieved her fire-arm, stowing it away in some unknown compartment.

Popping back up straight, Riza stood awkwardly in front of him, the door now shut.

Staring to the left as if to fake her attention on something else, she spoke, "Sir, I don't mean to be rude, but-"

"You want to know why I'm here, right?"

"Yes sir."

"It's not military business, please drop the sir-s for now."

"Yes si-um, okay. Then why are you-"

"I was on my way to a military social gathering, but when my driver passed your house, I decided I'd rather converse with you than the others."

"So we're speaking as friends?"

"Yes, exactly."

"So I can say anything I want?"

"Basically."

"WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GO?" Riza grabbed his collar, pulling him closer, their faces only a few inches apart.

Opening his mouth, Roy almost spoke, but then he seemed to revoke the words. His face remained completely stoic as she yelled.

"You come back for only a day, say like four words to me, then leave. Do you have any idea how prepared I was back then? DO YOU?"

"Prepared for what exactly?"

Riza's temper slowly faded, and as it floated away, she slowly unclenched his shirt collar. When her hand was calm, she slid from his neck to his collar bone, leaving her relaxed hand on him. Her head dropped and her golden bangs shaded her face.

Roy seemed the slightest bit concerned by this. Bringing his arm up slowly, he only graced her cheek with his finger before she slapped his arm away. Failure was not an option to Roy, so he brought his arms around her back, pulling her closer and closer into himself. He leaned his head ever so slightly down to touch her forehead against his own.

Then he felt the wetness of his shirt touch his skin. As the water spread, more and more of his skin became ice cold. Each of her tears seemed to burn like hell, then freeze immediately afterward.

Riza's hands came up, taking a firm hold on his face. She pushed his head away from hers, looking away and down at the wooden floor. His hands came up to hold her shoulders, She pushed against him, trying to break his hold. Dropping her arms from his face, she used them to push him away.

To no avail, she gave up. Her limp arms lay on his chest, her face turned to the floor still. A single tear dripped off her face to the floor.

"Riza, I'm sorry. I'm not letting go."

Clenching his hands on her shoulders, he let go with one hand, sliding up her neck to her head. Slowly but surely, he managed to turn her face towards him so he could become lost in her eyes.

She smiled ever so slightly as he wiped under her eyes. Bringing a limp hand up, she laid her hand over his, carefully squeezing his hand.

Roy leaned in close to Riza's ear, cleared his throat, and purred, "I came here to hold you, Riza and I don't plan to let you ruin that."

Riza only murmured, "Selfish."

"What?"

Raising her voice, she purred back, "Selfish."

"Would you mind if I was a little more selfish?"

She simply nodded her head 'no'. This action, however, was all she could manage before he pulled her forward into his lips. Letting her go only to take in air, he leaned his head forward to touch hers once more. Riza attempted to speak, but just as she opened her mouth, he took the opportunity to kiss her again. The words she spoke came out in a murmured squeak.

As their kiss deepened, he pulled her against him, lifting her off the ground.

Breaking their kiss, she growled, "Mustang, what are you doing?"

He carried her to her bed, laying her down gently across the mattress as he climbed on top of her. Her eyes widened and her heartbeat sped up as he watched her for only a moment before indulging himself with her taste once again. Riza snatched the hair on the back of his head as their tongues clashed.

As he brought his hand down her side, she wiggled under him. Taking this as an invitation, Roy traced his fingers over her stomach, feeling her body lurch under his touch. Riza pushed against him, breaking their moment.

"I asked you a question!"

When there was no answer, Riza pulled the gun from her shirt and shoved the barrel into the side of his head. "Get off!"

Again their lips joined in a heated battle, his hot breath hitting her face. With her free hand, she ruffled his hair and pushed his tongue away with hers. After a few seconds, he broke away from her and sluggishly backed off her, leaving her pointing the gun at him.

"Riza, I love you. I have always loved everything about you. I read in the dictionary that one of the definitions of love is to thrive on, to need. After thinking, I came to the conclusion that I can't be Roy Mustang if I don't have Riza Hawk-eye. I truly need you; without you, I'm not sure what I am. So please, think it over. If…if you need me too." With that, he left her there, alone.

Dropping her head back onto the bed, she looked towards the door. _Do I need him?_


	2. Decieved

The next morning, Riza Hawk-eye strode into work with an odd swing in her step. As she passed Fuery, she spoke some what loudly, "Good morning, Fuery!" He stopped, his jaw slamming against the floor.

Turning the corner, Riza spun in a circle before condemning her excitement just as she reached the general's room. Taking a deep breath, she opened the door to reveal Roy Mustang sitting in his new office chair frantically signing papers that were probably due within the next ten minutes.

"Good morning, General Mustang. Is there anything I can help you with?"

He looked up from his paper work once he heard her voice. He stared at her as if he was sixteen again and staring at the girl who had taken his first kiss. The red on his face began to spread, as if the fact that she was in his presence made him embarrassed.

Finally remembering she had asked him a question, he stuttered, "Um, uh, N-no thank y-y-you, Ha-Hawk-eye, I-I'll, um, I'll manage." He threw himself back into his papers, signing them so quickly, light couldn't have done any better.

"Are you alright, sir?"

He stole a glance at her before pushing himself back to his work. "I-I'm fine, thank you."

Once the papers were done, he politely asked Cheska to take them to the new Fuhrer. Leaning back in his chair, he ran his fingers through his ebony black hair, his eyes watching the ceiling. Another deep blush returned to his face once he noticed Riza watching him. He tried to act cool and collected as usual but this new thing he felt in the pit of his stomach ached. Leaning back just a little bit more in his chair, his stomach lurched as their eyes locked together. This feeling threw him off balance and off his chair into a lump on the floor.

"Sir, what is the matter? Are you ill?" She came over to him, holding out her hand. He took it, but only to blush more as she helped him up. Bringing her hand away from his, she felt his forehead. "Sir, you're burning up!"

Roy's expression now held a look of annoyance. He wanted to say Of course I'm burning up, you're in my office! Instead, he chose to look away from her, his entire face red. "I'm sorry, Riza."

"Don't worry about it." She drew a little closer to him. "I thought about what you said. I need you too. I love you, Roy. I couldn't tell you yesterday because I need you to understand I'm not just some 20 dollar whore you can screw anytime you want."

What she said gave him mixed emotions. At first, relief, then angst, then love, then lust, and finally understanding. "I need to know. Is it possible for me to need and want you even though I can't have you yet?"

"And I ask you this; Can a need and a want be the same?"

As he leaned towards her and her lips parted just a tad, the door opened and Cheska returned with another stack of paper work. She stopped in her tracks as what she saw was Roy about to kiss Riza like this was his first kiss and Riza acting like this was her first kiss. At this point, she was glad she hadn't opened the door very violently because neither of the too noticed her.

Pulling out a camera, she took a picture just as Roy touched Riza's lips with his. The flash startled both of them left clutching each others arms. Cheska then used the papers to create a fog for her escape.

Both of the two turned their heads back to face each other, then back to the door, then each other. Both of them furiously sprinted out the door, almost killing each other in the process.

Roy barked, "She can't have gotten far! Let's go!" The two of them destroyed anyone that was in their way in the hall. Riza saw Cheska turn a corner and directed Roy. She whipped out a simple pistol and took off running right behind Roy. As they spotted Cheska again, Riza shot at her feet, forcing her to have to move her feet to the left. As she did so, Roy snapped his fingers and created a fire blast right next to her, knocking her over.

The two of them walked forward with anger etched into their features. They stopped only a foot away from her and glared into her frightened face. Her skin turned ghost white in fear as she shakily handed Roy the camera with the picture hanging out the end. Just as Roy's fingers touched the camera, Riza snatched away the picture. At first she still seemed angry, but then her features softened and a smile broke away her frown.

Riza turned to Roy, holding the picture out. "Aw, you look so cute!"

Roy looked at the picture, blushed, then attempted to snatch it out of her hand. He failed as she pulled it away from him.

"I'm keeping this."

Roy frowned, bringing his fingers up threateningly. Riza thought for only a moment before stuffing the picture down the top of her uniform into her bra.

"I wouldn't suggest doing that if you ever want to see this." As she said this, she hovered her hand over her chest.

Roy's glare and frown deepened as his shoulders and arm dropped in unison. He managed to let out a little growl before she grabbed his face and kissed his cheek.

Unable to hold his frown for long, he grabbed her arms and pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"Dinner, tonight at my place?"

Riza looked up at him curiously, then furrowed her brow into a scowl, "If you try anything funny, I'll kill you. But, yes, I would like that, sir."

Roy only smiled and hugged her before of the two of them finally realized what a mess they had caused. Then they noticed how many people were watching them. Riza looked to the crowd, then to Roy. She frowned at him, growled, and stormed off. He only looked after her longingly before giving death glares to each and every person in the hall. After which, he raised his left hand, holding his fingers in snapping position. All the people quickly fled the scene.

The rest of the afternoon was spent by Roy cleaning up their mess and Riza randomly checking in and delivering orders to people. It was rather uneventful, and Roy was feeling slightly upset by the fact that he hadn't seen her the rest of the day. Whenever a person walked around the corner, his eyes lit up. Once that person noticed him and he saw that they were not Riza, he scowled and threw a death glare. The people responded to this by sprinting out of the hallway in a rush, sometimes dropping papers that were later picked up by Lieutenant Havoc.

As Roy finished his rampant cleaning and filing lost equipment reports, he left the scene of the crime on his way to his office. As he opened the door, the scarlet evening sunlight flooded his eyes. Pacing in slowly and making his way to his chair, he didn't even consider there being another person in the room.

Turning the chair around, he found it more heavy than usual. He saw the thing sleeping in his chair just then. Riza's dog. The dog woke up, wagging its tail at first, then growling. Roy turned his head in confusion, then followed the dogs gaze to behind himself at the now closed door. Seeing movement, he whipped his head to the right, but then calmed himself as he found it to be only Riza.

She walked closer to Roy as he relaxed and spoke, "Why so jumpy Roy?" She brought her hands up to lay across his shoulders. Giving him a small massage before lacing her fingers behind his neck, she looked into his eyes.

He didn't return her gaze. "I guess I'm stressed a little. Because of this morning, I have a couple mounds of paper work to do."

"I'm sorry." She circled around him to his back, making circular motions with her fingers. She felt some muscles relax, while others stayed tight.

Completely relaxed, Roy did not take note as one hand left his back for a moment. Everything went black. He only felt the final thud of his body smacking the floor.


	3. Hello, Goodbye

He woke up to a strange smell. It tickled his nose, filling his throat with its aroma. He almost couldn't breath it was so strong. It smelled almost like rose petals and apple cider combined together; to Roy, he could have just fallen asleep.

Suddenly he remembered what had happened to him. Reaching towards his pocket, his arms were restrained by chains. He looked up to see his wrists chained together. Looking down, not much was different. His ankles were chained to the cold, brick floor.

He had been stripped down except for his Full Metal Panic boxers. Feeling suddenly embarrassed, his cheeks reddened a bit until he saw Riza walk by his cage. She smirked evilly at him.

Roy's face erupted in an enraged scowl, raising his voice and struggling against the restraints, "What have you done with Riza?"

The fake Riza let out an evil cackle. "So you think you've figured it out? Fine, I'll give you that much. She's in the cell next to yours, ugly human filth. Soon you'll be dead so it doesn't matter." She snickered again before changing into a Bengal tiger. She growled menacingly before leaving the opposite direction from which she had appeared.

"Riza! Can you hear me?" Roy cried anxiously, hoping she was truly there.

A painful moan was heard before some mumbling. Then chains rattling, then cursing.

"Riza!"

Her voice flooded his ears, "Roy?"

"Is that you?"

"Obviously, sir, or I wouldn't have replied."

Both spoke simultaneously, "How did you end up here?" Though Riza added, "Sir?" to the end.

Roy barked, "Ladies first!"

"Yes, sir." The chains jingled and she murmured, "Ow." Taking a deep breath, she spoke calmly, "I was on my way home from work two days ago, sir."

"I see." Roy's eyes fell to the floor, his heart sinking. "So it was all a lie…"

"Excuse me, but, what sir, is a lie?"

"It's nothing, don't worry about it."

"Yes sir."

There was a long silence before Roy spoke, "I'm sorry."

"What sir?"

"I apologize for my absence as General."

"It's fine, sir."

Another long pause before Riza spoke.

"Sir, excuse me for asking, but how did they capture you?"

"I don't know if you saw them or not, but it was a shapeshifter. She turned herself into things."

"So she turned into water?"

Nostalgically, Roy replied, "Yes exactly."

"Unfortunately, it didn't fight me. It pretended to be you to get close to me."

Roy was a bit stunned and confused, words that he wasn't even going to say before got stuck in his throat.

"He…he told me he loved me. He took me to dinner, he told me what I thought to be everything. I let it…affect my decisions as a military officer and because of that I was captured and will soon be executed by the enemy. I'm sorry I…I failed you sir."

"Riza, I'm sorry I lied to you. The same happened to me…"

"The shapeshifter turned into you and you were told by yourself that you love you-?"

"No!" Roy screeched. The redness of his face could be heard through his voice. "It turned into you!"

"…And you were caught by it the way I was…?"

"Yes, Riza, because, because I-"

A door at the end of the hall could be heard opening; the two were immediately quiet. Roy growled to himself before the shapeshifter thing came by, a young man following. The tiger formed into a young girl.

The girl spoke, twirling her red braid between her fingers, "Can we kill them now brother? Please?" She hissed.

The red-headed young man looked into Roy's cage. Roy shot a death glare. If looks could kill, this would be a one-hit K.O. The boy crouched behind the little girl, shivering. He opened his mouth and whispered something to her. She smiled.

Spitting into Riza's cage, she snarled, "Filthy vermin number two gets to live today. So unfortunate for you-"

Roy spoke quietly to himself, "You touch her and I'll explode your fingers right off your hands." If his death glare killed one person earlier, now it would have killed two hundred.

She snickered, then mocked him, "Aw, sounds like we've got a little pair here. You know what the sad part is? You won't get to live to tell each other how you feel! Haha!"

Roy smiled evilly before shouting, "Riza, I love you and I'll always love you!"

Her head popped up from its fake sleeping position. She whispered, "You too Roy."

The little girl growled loudly before turning into a raptor. Foaming at the mouth she grabbed Roy's cage and bit the bars, clawing and kicking them with her limbs. Jumping back, she roared loudly before ramming into the cage, bending it. The young man grabbed her tail. She whipped around and snapped his arm off. Blood splattered all over her and the ground as the boy flailed his arm and screamed in pain. She growled, then turned human, apologizing quickly.

"Brother, I'm sorry, I just…" Tears came to her eyes and she screamed at Roy, "This is your fault! Brother wouldn't be hurt now if it weren't for you!" An evil smile creased her lips.

Opening Riza's cage, she pushed a button and a tall, dark headed man came in. He picked up Riza and carried her to Roy's cage, just out of his reach. Their eyes met; searching one another, without a word.

The tall man pulled Roy's arms down and around her head, his clamped wrists crossing just behind her neck. They both finally understood. The tall man pulled the clamp down only slightly, then re-clamped Roy's wrists. Pulling the original clamp forward, he slowly pulled Roy's arms together, pulling the two closer and closer.

As her lips passed his, she mouthed, "Goodbye."

Almost breaking Roy's arms, the tall man pulled more and more until Riza could feel the strain on her breathing. Roy felt like crying, the sound of her last few breaths laying heavily on his ears.


	4. Another Dream

"General Mustang? Sir, it's time to go home."

Lifting his head groggily from his desk, Roy let out a yawn. He strained his eyes to see what was in front of him, but with no such luck, he yawned again. Taking another moment to adjust, he rolled his head around on his shoulders and wiped his eyes. Suddenly remembering that Hawk-eye was in danger, he jumped up from his seat, throwing what were probably important papers, all in the floor.

"Sir, please calm down."

Riza's voice calmed his rage and he held his forehead with his hand.

Roy spoke quietly, "So it was all a dream…?" His head popped up and he threatened Hawk-eye with his gloved hand. "But how do I know this isn't…"

"Sir?" Riza seemed quite confused at first, but then as she watched his movements, she seemed to understand. Taking out one of her prized fire-arms from her blue coat, she rolled behind the general's chair, coming up much too quickly for him to have time to respond. She wrapped her left arm around his neck and held her gun to his head. "This is how it will end if you play this game, sir. Please, come to your senses."

Again his thoughts cooled but he had his doubts. Lowering both of his arms to his sides, he partially leaned into her. "How long was I asleep, Lieutenant?"

Slowly she let him go, though he continued to lean back. Her feet shuffled once to compensate for his weight. "Almost all day, sir."

"Now I remember…" The night before, he had been out drinking with Havoc and Fuery. Riza had gone with them only to drive them home. His other two friends had extra work to do and couldn't make it, so the three of them drank enough for five. Once he had gotten to work this morning, he had taken two pain killers and fell asleep at his desk in the middle of writing a report about the Fullmetal Alchemist's work in Leore. "I'm sorry I caused you trouble." Even though it was just a dream, the relief of Riza being alright washed over him.

Turning to her slowly, Roy smiled at her. "In my dream, we were lured into a trap by two new Homonculi. They deceived us by turning into each other; the female Homonculus became you, and the male became me."

Riza made a bit of an annoyed face, "Sir, I would have never fallen for a trap that simple."

A part of Roy died at the sound of this. "Right."

She could tell by the tone of his answer he wanted her to say something else. However, there was no way for her to tell him the truth. If she did, it would afflict his decisions on the battlefield or later during a mission. Her gaze only fell to the floor, in hope that he wouldn't look.

"Riza…"

The sound of her name on his lips caused her inner self to smile.

"You have a beautiful name. When I hear it, I think of a Japanese garden in full bloom with the pink blossoms floating to delicately brush against the earth once they reach it. The smell blooming with the scent of cherry and a light hint of cinnamon mixed in, creating an intoxicating blend that ensnares my nose. What an amazing picture just one word makes in my mind…"

"Why are you telling me this?"

Roy stared into her eyes, though she was focused on the floor. He didn't know why.

Her hair covering her face, she threw up her arm in a crisp salute before bolting out the door, saying nothing. Roy only watched her go.

At home, Roy's mind could not stray from his so-called dream. What if it was real? What if he was being fooled by the Homonculi? But Riza's reactions felt so real…he definitely could tell the difference in the way the Homonculus looked at him to the way she did.

His arm lay lazily over his face as he lay in his bed. He breathed out warm air, remembering the part of his dream where he visited her. Was any of it real? Her lips on his, her breath on his face, her warm body under his fingers…it had felt so real.

His mind literally thought itself to sleep, slowly just fading out.

Riza hung her coat on the rack near the door. She walked to the bathroom, her boots clanking on the wooden floor. Peeling off the rest of her blue military uniform, she watched her face in the mirror. She wondered what the general saw in her. She wondered why he had stopped at her house that night and just collapsed on her floor shortly after he had retreated from her body. Thinking of that night, she felt something in her stomach flip.

She remembered his fingers tracing her body, his soft kisses that almost drug her into a trance. She was almost sure he didn't feel the same about all the other women he continued that with. The thought of him being with other women made her skin crawl. The thought made her want to go to his house right now and shoot him several times. The jealousy and anger that this thought brought her was inconceivable. She hit the wall with her fist to calm herself.

Stepping into the warm bathwater, she sighed contentedly. In the end, she really was doing him a favor by abstaining from him. It was better if he just believed what they had almost done was part of his dream.

Shortly after falling asleep, Roy began to have the same dream he had had earlier. Once he woke up in the morning, he felt empty. He knew Riza wanted to protect him. He appreciated this, and in turn, he would abandon his feelings for her.

This time.


End file.
